'R' IS FOR… REJECTION, CRITICISM & HOW TO COPE

So, if you really really anger them - anyone who feels slightly on the fringes of society will support you. For example Iain Banks' publishers used really horrible reviews to promote his first novel, THE WASP FACTORY - even printing them on the first few pages of the book!.Independent, low-budget American film director, John Waters' bad-taste movie PINK FLAMINGOES got unbelievably bad reviews.

Just look at these quotes: "Like a septic-tank explosion, it has to be seen to be believed."Or, from the New York Times:"Surely one of the most vile, stupid and repulsive movies ever made.And US critic Rex Reed wrote:"Where do these people come from? Where do they go when the sun goes down? Isn't there a law or something?".John Waters put them all on the poster! In his autobiography, SHOCK VALUE, Waters writes:"When someone vomits watching one of my movies, it's like getting a standing ovation.".So if you get negative criticism? Get over it! Ego's aren't hymens. If you're an artist, then critics are as inevitable as death or taxes...And if you can't take the heat? Get out of the kitchen!

MENTAL HEALTH WARNING: Acting is NOT for you if you can't take criticism… Just listen to your friends talking about their favourite and least favourite plays, movies, bands, artists, paintings etc. Nobody can agree on everything. People change their minds. Maybe they hated the film because they saw it in an uncomfortable cinema on a hot day when the air-conditioning was broken. Maybe they only like that show because that's where they met the love of their life. Isn't it all just their opinion anyway?

Here's a new way to look at rejection: When a casting director or director is casting an actor for a role, they are usually looking for a specific "essence" which the actor can bring to his or her creation of the character. Different examples of this kind of "essence" are: earthy, well-mannered, bubbly, intense, frivolous or flighty, solid and secure, a go-getter. Even though as an actor you might be able to play a character based on any of these qualities, casting directors, producers and directors often look for an actor who exudes whatever quality they are looking for. This means that they're looking for something very specific when they're casting. If what they are looking for is part of who you are, you may get a callback. If it's not part of your personality makeup, you may not get called back or cast in the role. This doesn't mean you're not a good actor, or that you didn't do a good audition, it simply means that they were probably looking for a different type of person.Imagine that you're in a shop looking at shoes. Each pair of shoes has its own "personality" - some are elegant, some are cute, some are flamboyant and some simple. If you were buying shoes, you'd make a choice based on the pair that go best with your clothes and that you find most comfortable - you wouldn't buy the shoes that you didn't feel were right for you.

The casting process is similar:One problem specific to actors is that the rejection experienced in the business can become personalised. In other words, if you are rejected as an actor for a certain role, you may feel as if you yourself are being rejected.The problem is that an actors use themselves in their work. It's your face, your voice, your body - so it's easy to feel rejected when you and the "product" both live in the same body . . . Understanding that you are not being rejected as a person when you don't get a callback or the role is a very important distinction to make.

It's important to not take rejection personally-you need to know that even if you are rejected, it is not a reflection on you or your talent. The best thing to do after an audition is to focus on the next one, or on making your presentation better, or on other things you can do to improve your acting craft. You can send a thank-you note to the director if you wish, but if you build up your hopes for every role you audition for, you're letting yourself in for depression if you don't get called back or don't get the role.

You need to find a balance between working in a positive way and expecting the best to happen, and not building your hopes so high that your disappointment is extreme.If you find yourself getting more and more depressed about criticism or rejection, there may be deeper issues that you're beginning to come to terms with. Acting is a very difficult profession, and as much as it would be nice to believe in the dream of "overnight success," it happens very rarely - if at all.Acting can be so much fun, and for those love to perform, it can be hard to recognise that it takes hard work to become a professional.

It's disappointing to be rejected when you're getting close to something you really want to do, and it can be a reminder of other situations in which you didn't get what you wanted. Pay attention to your feelings-they are part of a healthy system which alerts you to problems and difficulties in your life.It's okay to acknowledge your disappointment when you experience rejection. Don't deny your disappointment, because that can cause more problems. Understand that it's a natural reaction, then let it go, and go on to the next audition.

Remember, no matter how bad things get, there are always options and there are always ways to feel better. YOU are always more important than your acting career. You, your life, yourself and your feelings should always come first.Actors need determination, persistence, and the ability to endure rejection with a smile. If you're into acting as a career, then expect to spend many years developing a successful career. Look at it this way. Say you had to have a couple of fillings done on your teeth. So at the bus stop, on your way to the dentist, you meet some guy who notices you are in some pain. You explain you are going to the dentist to get some work done.

"Hey, save your money" - he says - "I've been to the dentist a couple of times. Seen a movie about it on TV once. It doesn't look difficult. I'll do your fillings for you… and at half the price!"Would you trust your teeth to someone who has been to the dentist a couple of times and seen a movie about it on TV? Or are you going to trust a professional; someone who has spent many years studying, training, practicing and developing experience? Right. So why would anyone expect to become a successful, professional actor or actress without spending a considerable amount of time and energy studying, practicing and developing experience in the fine art of acting?

Of course that doesn't mean you can't get acting jobs early in the process of building a career. Just remember that it will take time, years before you will be able to earn a regular or decent living as an actress or actor. A lot of people never earn all their income acting and must have other sources of income. Even HARRISON FORD (Indiana Jones, Han Solo and Jack Ryan) started as a carpenter…If you are vain, ill-tempered, prone to explosive outbursts when things don't go your way, walk out in a huff, are frequently negative and often exhibit other such disagreeable behaviour - then acting is not the job for you.

You can't act like a spoilt rich superstar until you are one! Until then, who is going to want to work with you more than the one time if they get stuck with you? So it's a good idea NOT to throw a tantrum at a director. They might have to work with you to finish the job, but they'll never work with you again.

REMEMBER: IF ACTING ISN'T FUN - IT ISN'T WORTH DOING.